Cutting

She toyed with the razor blade in her hand, flipping it over slowly and contemplating what she was about to do and how the small rusted piece of metal would contribute. It wasnt new to her. The scars werent visible anymore and unless anyone remembered no one knew what she had planned, not that it mattered now, she had alienated everyone around her by a series of mistakes she had made, she had hurt everyone she cared about and pretended to care about others and still managed to hurt them. She most regretted how she had treated her boyfriend, she hadnt told him half of what she had done and she couldnt bring herself to face him and be honest, he had loved her and idolised her and she pretended to recipricate and be the person she had lead him to believe she was. She knew she was a manipulitive person and she could no longer get her way, there was no one left. Consumed by her thoughts she stopped fiddling with the blade, then considered once again what she was about to do, she had hurt someone so much it killed her to believe she was capable of such a thing and the harsh reality left her feeling cold and shaken. He kept asking her why she didnt just dump him if she wanted somone else why she had to wait till it hurt so much he felt ripped apart, she gripped the blade tighter and positioned it at her wrist and wondered the same thing herself, she wanted to show him it hurt her and she wanted to hurt like he did. She slid the blade harshly along the length of her forearm and watched as the red trail followed it with a certain fascination.
They hurt together...